Hey, 15-year-old-me....

Hey, 15-year-old-me....you are in high school now and you have (n.o__i.d.e.a.), but the next 7 years of your life are going to drastically change who you are and how you live. There will be some surprises but you will not regret any of it because every experience you have will become a part of you. The happy times, the sad times, and the boring times...I hope you remember them all. But the one important thing you learn is that even though it hurts now...I mean it will really hurt and you will be stressed out...you will need to keep a strong head on more than one occasion...I still need to tell you not to give up. Because if you give up, it will be the end of those dreams. Keep that steady mind of yours steady always and I am so sure it will end up being great. Why am I telling you this...? Because, man I wish someone had warned me and told me to be prepared. 

My take on u2's new album! :) (Songs of Innocence)

1) The Miracle (of Joey Ramone)

I never listened to the band, The Ramones, but this song by itself is very catchy and appealing at first, but it will get tedious to listen to on repeat after a couple of days :P The lyrics are quite good though and Bono, as usual, doesn't disappoint. It is a good upbeat opener.

2) Every Breaking Wave

I normally don't like slow songs, but I was immediately captured by this song by its lyrics and chorus, and upbeat ending! And The Edge brings magic with his guitar here and there in the song to take you along the waves of the song.

3) California (There Is No End to Love)

There's always a song about California, but this song doesn't just disappear from the album. It has a strong opening bass line and the Beach Boys inspired opening makes it a unique song. But Bono's Woah-Oh-Ooohs are a little cliche and the lyrics seem premature.

4) Song for Someone

Another slow ballad by U2. So far in the album this is one song, which even though is not my favorite, reminds you of some of U2's older songs like the songs from Joshua Tree.

5) Iris (Hold Me Close)

At this point of the time in the album we hear familiar guitar riffs from The Edge and we hear that sound of young Bono when he sings about his mother.

6) Volcano

It has a very punk-rock sound! The song is amazing in all aspects! If you like songs to bang your head to this is the one you are looking for! The chorus is catchy and Bono can really hit the high notes! Can definitely listen to this on repeat! The "YOU ARE ROCK N' ROLL" part really labels this song as a classic rock piece.

7) Raised by Wolves

One of my favorites in the whole album! The start...WOW! Leading up to great lyrics about a bombing in Dublin. Then comes the unpredictable chorus "Raised by Wolves" and the band definitely does justice to this song in all aspects.

8) Cedarwood Road

Another great song! It has the same start of punk/rock like "Volcano". But that cools down and we get a beautiful masterpiece and performance. Hearing this I can really picture Bono in his childhood experiences.

9) Sleep Like a Baby Tonight

3 in a row! Another amazing song! In this day and age these rock songs take me back to the 1980's. It starts like a lullaby, but it is anything but! After 1:30 The Edge comes to take lead and completely changes the sound of the song! Oh and here is the best part of the song! At Bono sings in his highest pitch every "Hope...Hope is where my door is...", putting a great finish to the song!

10) This is Where You Can Reach Me Now

The start is the best part of the song! With the "Soldier...Soldier..." part it had a great intro like the rest of the songs and is a good song that cannot be ignored. It does start to take of a pop song later on reminding me of Micheal Jackson ;)

11) The Troubles

First of all...who is singing in the beginning? I know Bono sings high, but there is definitely a girl throughout the song! Again this sounds like a alternative rock song that could maybe have been written by Imagine Dragons or Coldplay (still great bands), nonetheless this song definitely deserves to be here in this album! It has a completely different sound than the rest of the songs! But who doesn't love a little versatility. "Oh wait there it is" is what you'll say when you the small signature U2 guitar solo near the end of the song :P

U2 is not ready to retire! They still have so much to offer the world and I am so glad they are still making such inspiring pieces! I can't wait till they go on tour!

Free Bird

Sometimes we think that we are free.
We think that we possess the world
and that it will become anything for us.
We hope so much that we overcome reality.
If we accomplish something,
next time we think we can move mountains.
This is all an illusion.
We are all bound to the earth
by the restraint of gravity.
The are physical laws that prevent us
from achieving the otherwise possible.
I know what you are thinking?
That I am pouring negativity into your ears.
What if I tell you I myself am free now?
I am unbound; I am my own and nobody else's.
Now do you believe me?

Lana Del Rey - Dark thoughts ("Ride")

I was in the winter of my life, and the men I met along the road were my only summer.
At night I fell asleep with visions of myself, dancing and laughing and crying with them.
Three years down the line of being on an endless world tour, and my memories of them were the only things that sustained me, and my only real happy times.
I was a singer - not a very popular one,
I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet, but upon an unfortunate series of events saw those dreams dashed and divided like a million stars in the night sky that I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken.
But I didn't really mind because I knew that it takes getting everything you ever wanted, and then losing it to know what true freedom is.
When the people I used to know found out what I had been doing, how I'd been living, they asked me why - but there's no use in talking to people who have home.
They have no idea what it's like to seek safety in other people - for home to be wherever you lay your head.
I was always an unusual girl.
My mother told me I had a chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality; just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide and as wavering as the ocean...
And if I said I didn't plan for it to turn out this way I'd be lying...
Because I was born to be the other woman.
Who belonged to no one, who belonged to everyone.
Who had nothing, who wanted everything, with a fire for every experience and an obsession for freedom that terrified me to the point that I couldn't even talk about it, and pushed me to a nomadic point of madness that both dazzled and dizzied me.

Just enjoying writing poetry as usual :)

I can't let go.
Don't show me how.
I'll live with the pain
swallowing it somehow.

I can't let go.
Don't fell bad for me.
It left a scar but,
it's not a burn of third degree.

I can't let go.
Is having emotion
a sign of weakness?
I disagree with that notion.

I can't let go.
Yes it's long-lasting damage.
But don't send me to a psych.
My happiness I can salvage.

If I let go,
Will you leave me idly?
Or will you follow me?
I need to know.

--The only way I know how

This is the idea I woke up to

Her father told her work was her best friend
They knew no other life or means
Arduous tasks greeted her every morning
She wanted the days of her labor to end

How can she deny her father his one hope?
She loved her parents more than herself
If only something could rescue them
But till then she had to be brave and cope.

With care and devotion she planted
She repaired
She transported so
money would be granted.

Days would fly by before she read.
She came across an article
that changed her life.
She would go to college instead.

Everyday she would contemplate
the same article with dedication
until she understood the implications
that would change her fate.

She spent nights under the candle light
Writing out a flyer to send
to the institute she wanted to join
hoping to be drawn out from her plight

She kept in mind
her loved ones
she would strive for them
to be unconfined

She sent her letter in the mail
Everyday checking for replies
still the post devoid of any response
That was the end of her tale.

--Teach me

I was listening to the Beatles today....

I gave up on the crosswalk
I ran past the yellow light
I stood in the middle
I reacted from fright

I am standing still on
what now looks like a bar code
I am paused
Like the cover of Abbey Road

I can do nothing but hear
the Lennon-McCartney library
In my life, for some relief
I look into my crystal clear memory

Thoughts come together whirling
like leaves around a stem
then disappearing into the green light
I know I'll stop and think about them

--Walk on tomorrow

Everything I touch turns 'old'...

Seeing Brazil's defeat last night against Germany evoked emotions in Brazilians and many fans worldwide. Some people may say Brazil's luck ran out right at time when Germany decided to play their best game ever. Was this game a test of emotional strength? If it was, then Brazil had the home advantage but this did not suffice. Did Brazil even have the potential to defeat the powerful European team of Germany? Maybe that is bedsides the point. But, the part that was the most heart-felt was how Brazil succumbed after the first two goals scored by Muller and Klose. Brazil should have come back better and stronger. No, instead they shriveled in front of the mighty Germans. Who is to blame? Only themselves of course. This leads me to a deeper subject.

Defeat is hard to overcome. The power to surpass defeat and welcome success has to come from inside. When the odds are stacked high against you, like in a game of football against the unrelenting Germans, it is important to hold you head high and march through. More than often the victorious ones are ones who can handle being put down. In my opinion, Brazil should have put up a better fight for the sake of their teammates and their country, instead of taking defeat on a silver platter by the Germans.

It is easy to say that "everything I touch turns old". Sometimes we all want the sympathy vote. But does that ensure us a victory? I strongly believe it doesn't. Willpower rules all. Hard work and determination are what guarantees victory over the pity vote.

As a fan of the Netherlands Oranje team in this Fifa World Cup 2014, I am hoping Netherlands does not back down to Argentina. Once again, media says Argentina's Messi will bring the victory home, but I would not want that to happen without a good fight from the Dutch!

Fútbol Fever

Football (or Soccer for those of you from USA) fever has taken over. This is week the semi-finals and finals of the FIFA World Cup 2014 will take place. The WC got me listening to artists like Shakira, Pitbull, and Enrique who have made appearances in international football tournaments.

This led me to the song 'La Tortura' by Shakira which I have heard before but yesterday I actually listened to the lyrics and used some help from translators to figure out the meaning of the song.

It is a good song and even though I never took learning Spanish quite seriously over the four years I spent learning it in my high school, it is a beautiful language. And just listening to it puts one in the fútbol spirit.

Poem #6 for the New Yorker magazine.....the last one ;)

Townspeople gathered in a mob.

Pitchforks and torches illuminating hatred.

Betrayal exposing an inside job

on the verge of painting the house pure red.

The cage walls receded.

Compromising the life inside.

The third man had succeeded

in taking pieces of my pride.

Leaving the abode brimming with griefs,

I left the town denying any amnesty.

Defeat is not in my dictionary of beliefs.

That was how I meet this man--dishonesty

----The Third Man: Dishonesty

poem #5 for the New Yorker magazine

I was a child.
You alone supported me
when I was beaten repeatedly.
My tears were my only misery.

Now I am strong.
I stand on my own two feet.
You looked at me and clicked delete.
Abandonment is a form of defeat.

You have no problem leaving me alone.
Your absence I will never condone.
I was honest to the bone.
But now my loyalty for you is overthrown.

--Third Leg

Poem #4 for the New Yorker magazine

You are a beast.
Everyone's invisible when you are hungry.
If your eyes meet a feast,
you can even jump the country.
You care the least
even if the other person is angry.

--Mainstream invisibility

Poem #3 for the New Yorker magazine

She kept a deep dark secret.
Now it is time for the truth.
She doesn't want to keep it;
it happened while in her youth
It is a part of her history.
But to everyone else it's a mystery.

But will anyone care?
Or will they just judge and stare?
Overcome with morbid fear,
she decided it was best to disappear.
Never to be seen anywhere.

--Under Her Pillow

Poem #2 for the New Yorker magazine

We dug together silently
a black hole that would take us.
Unknowingly ending in tragedy
and leaving arguments to discuss.

Every time the shovel hit the ground
there was no pulling back.
We had no idea where we were bound
or what was about to attack.

Inside the darkness swallowed
every tear we ever shed.
The emptiness quickly followed
the dreadful things you said.
Our happiness drowned like a sunken chest.
I am sorry for building this hollow nest.

--Down to Earth

Don't pout...write it out

Thoughts rush through my mind continuously throughout the day. It is a unfortunate truth but I cannot write all of my thoughts down. I don't think there is enough paper to capture all my day thoughts and night dreams. But whenever I get time in the day, I let my thoughts run smoothly on the text editor in front of me. I don't stop to think about what my fingers are typing on my keyboard. And honestly it is the best feeling in the world. Sometimes, I will feel super creative and I will be able to write a poem stanza by stanza with a basic rhyming scheme. And other days -- like today -- I will talk to my laptop screen. I converse through my writing.

In fact, writing has become a part of my life these days mostly because what goes on in my head becomes a lot more clear when it is written in ink. I don't know how many people can relate to this, but I find clarity when I am writing. Whether is a short piece, a poem, or a blog post--it's just plain fun!

Words can be a powerful tool. Combining the right words together can create a really powerful message! And I think everyone should try it out for themselves when they feel like they are having an overcrowded head :P

Yes I am talking to you

He sits in his chair as if he has no job in the world, but in fact he has the most important job to do in that office. He has to make decisions, decisions that make and break everything. Yet, he sits there with his fingertips joining his two hands. He looks like he's contemplating on what to do. But no we are wrong, he has already decided what his next move will be. He is playing out the sequence of events in his head. The consequences, the reactions to his decisions are clear to him. He gets up to walk towards the window. He looks out as if what he sees may somehow have an effect on what he will do next. But again we are wrong, he opens the window. There is a knock at the door, and his secretary walks in and says, "Sir, they are here". He faces shows no emotion. He has anticipated everything, there will be no surprises of that he seems sure. They sit and start an elaborate discussion that quickly gets elevated into an argument. Now there are multiple talking and many controversies on the table. That is when the soft cold wind comes in through the window. Papers start flying everywhere. There is chaos as businessmen in their suits, with their ties flying and blocking their view, are trying to gather their possessions and settle down again. In all the chaos, the man stays absolutely still in the same pose we found him a bit earlier, but this time he seems to have a slight smirk on his face. He knew that these men would come to his office with pages of complaints and demands would never be able to put them together, not even with a paper-clip, into something solid. As things begin to settle, the men realize how disoriented they have become. They are not able to recover and are now silent. When the draft passes, he sees another girl at the other end of table, who seemed unperturbed. Even her hair seemed unyielding to its perfect position. The man sat upright, it seemed to him he finally met a worthy individual. Someone who was not just full of 'loose leaf pieces of paper'. He asks her to state the reasons behind her presence. She says, "Sir, I wanted to meet the man who is supposed to be dead". The man abruptly stands up, and ends the meeting. Once he is alone with the girl, he asks, "How did you find me?".

His secretary walks in, "Sir, they are here." The man realizes there is no good behind the window. He decides against opening it. He doesn't want to be discovered. His true identity is the one secret that nobody else can ever come to know. It would not play out well for him. He knew that. He would have to go along with the treacherous meeting after all. There was no other out for him. "There is no window." he says out loud.

"Sir," says the patient secretary.

"Yes, I am talking to you. There is no window in this room. There is no window on this glass wall. I want a window made."